Unexpected BIG things

I'm not even sure how to start this post! I'm going to list 5 things that have happened this March that has really impacted me. 

1. VISA was approved 

February 22 I went for my visa appointment after I applied online to change my visa. The online application itself took so much out of me because I didn't want to do it. I always run through worst case scenarios in my head and I just couldn't cope with the possibility of it being rejected. With no end in sight of covid ending it would have meant James and I would have been separated for the foreseaable future. I felt so much anxiety putting the application it and then the waiting process. On hindsight I still have no idea how I coped those 2 months. I applied under a fiancee visa which would have only been for 6 months and then we would have had to apply to extend it. The visa I was approved for was for 5 years, with no requirements and allows me to work immediately and to get indefinite leave to remain after it expires. The amount of relief I felt after getting that email on Monday 15 March is indescribable. The Home Office is notorious for rejecting applications, not going above and beyond what was requested so I really am extremely grateful and thankful for this outcome. James was really excited and brought back a bottle of prosecco for us that night which was really sweet. So grateful to the universe for making the stars align on this one for me, and for having the resources and support from my parents to even apply for the visa and be so supportive of my decision to stay here forever. 

2. References 

One thing I really regret is not keeping in better contact with my supervisors/ lecturers at uni and college. I was on fairly good terms with teachers in school. My mum suggested that every time I left a job I should get a letter of recommendation before leaving because its such a hassle once you've left. I'm in the thick of applying for jobs now and reached out to 2 lecturers which I think I was somewhat friendly with. They both responded within hours and agreed to write my references for any jobs moving forward and they were so nice about it too asking me how I was and going above and beyond asking me what they could do to help. 

3. Terry 

When I moved to Birmingham in 2017 after the Bar I knew absolutely no one and was staying in a house share in Small Heath. I had work collegaues but we didn't meet after work and I spent all my weekends with James in Leeds. The house I lived in was Terry's and I was his lodger for 4 months. During that time he was so friendly and nice and I honestly wouldn't have survived Birmingham without him. He took me out on my birthday and bought me presents, introduced me to his friends, and took me to visit his sisters pub in the countryside. He's the nicest and such a sweet soul. He's 72 but it felt like I made a friend my age. I reached out to ask him how he's been doing during covid and we started talking and he sent over a bottle of his homemade blackberry vodka.

I really appreciate these gestures and lasting friendships particularly at this point in my life. A reminder to reach out and maintain relationships which matter. 

4. Family 

I've been here for quite some time now, a year and a half and this is the longest time I've been away. This has been a sore spot recently because I feel like out of sight out of mind.

5. Living 

My piano has been getting much better. Jo has started me on 2 new books and I can't wait to start my exam pieces soon. Why didn't I do this earlier? Honestly I think most of my problems as a teenager was that I had all this energy and angst and nothing to channel it into. Been running faster and further than before, hopefully I'll be able to do a 10K race sometime this year fingers crossed. March 2020 when I started the NHS Couch to 5K i struggled with 3 minutes non stop and now 50 minutes is comfortable. The cats are doing well, we got a massive cat tree which they haven't touched at all. Typical. 

Came across this quote in the book 'You should talk to someone'; 

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. in that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." 

Must keep this in mind when dealing with people / difficult people. 

 

February Rants

This month feels quite emotionally charged because of various things in my personal life and whats happening in the world. A couple of things that have affected me; 

Tommy Thomas released a new book detailing Malaysian politics from the 1960s and his time as the AG of Malaysia. I read the first 3/4 of the book in about 2 days, and the book is 500 pages! I realised there's so much I don't know about Malaysian history and the background to why things are the way they are now. Its quite depressing that they made us learn such useless things during history at school like tamadun islam and local tokoh anti-penjajah when we could have been learning about the political background post independance. Everything from 1957 has shaped the way Malaysia is today and the rising anti-tolerant population and increasing corruption in government. The last few chapters of the book caught up to present times, which is when I got a little disillusioned with TT's version of 'the truth'. Things I actually lived through and read about in real time in the media is contrary to what he portrays in the book and it starts to feel like he's trying to save his skin and change public opinion of him. Overall it's been such a good read and I want to start reading up more on Malaysian politics. 

We finally let the cats outdoor for the first time! I'd been impatiently waiting to let them out since the first day we got them because they are both indoor cats and I thought it would be so exciting for them. Every other day I'd beg James to let them out but he was adamant to follow the 2 week rule and then we took them to the vet to get microchipped and the vet said 3 weeks would be better which extended my waiting time. We finally let them out last Sunday and I was so stressed. I don't know why but I thought they'd just lounge around in the garden where I could see them but they immediately decided to jump the fence and leave. They came back after 30 mins but I was so worried the whole time. Chairman Meow especially, is so big and fluffy he looks like a Maine Coon which makes me nervous that someone will steal him. 

The cats are settling in well, but they still have episodes where they're extremely clingy which can be so frustrating. I've read that they need 20 mins of playtime twice a day per cat. Which is what we do. But sometimes they refuse to play, refuse to go out and refuse to be stroked. They just want to sit on my chest and put their butts to my face which can get really annoying when you're in the middle of something. 

When reading TT's new book I discovered that his 26 year old daughter committed suicide. This really shook me. Having a parent like TT who gave her the best life had to offer, and she committed suicide anyways. The death of Thomas Raskin, the son of an American senator who was at Harvard and extremely wealthy also made me question why do people in good situations choose to kill themselves, whilst others who are battling illness or poverty struggle to survive. It doesn't make sense to me how someone with seemingly everything chooses to end it. 

It feels like everything is going wrong in the world. I just read that many developed countries are blocking the proposal to suspend patents during the pandemic. It just doesn't make sense to me. Why would they want to block other countries from having access to the covid vaccine? How do so many people in so many parliaments across the globe decide that healthcare goes to the highest bidder. I feel like too much of the world only look out for themselves, and nothing can change when the majority are morally inept. Countries in the map below marked X are blocking the suspension of patents. 

SOURCE: (Doctors without borders Australia) https://twitter.com/MSFAustralia/status/1361179518585606144?s=20

There have been so many instances in my life where something unaceptable to me and I just let it go because it was rude to 'talk back'. It got to a point where I started to react to everything in retalliation.  Now when I hear something unacceptable to me I just keep quiet and process the information. There is no point arguing with someone who is so set in their ways that they'll never change. But I don't see people the same light anymore, and its just shocking how those closest to me can have racist bigoted principles and no one says anything and accepts their views. Silence when injustice is happening makes you complicit in the injustice. Interestingly, my siblings have accepted this much easier then I have. I wonder if they agree, or did they realise earlier that its easier to just listen and nod than stand up to someone who will never change. 

The bleak state of politics in Malaysia. Now I understand why adults used to be so glued on to the news. Every news cycle brings more bad news which we should be used to by now but is still incredibly shocking. Rina Harun the Malaysian Women, Family and Community Development minister just got a full body makeover including plastic surgery and liposuction during a pandemic and is now doing photoshoots. She's paid of her RM1.4million debt and bankruptcy proceedings against her have been dropped. How stupid are we? Why do we have such idiots running the country? Basically anyone can become a politician in this day and age. You can do anything, say anything. The lack of integrity is upsetting and whats worse is there's nothing we can do about it except from ranting about it on twitter. 

Trump organised a whole coup and he still couldn't get impeached because they made it a partisan issue. That's the main thing about politics its always a partisan issue when actually most things that need to be done are bypartisan. Healthcare, safety, poverty these should all be bipartisan issues. Yet its treated as liberal propaganda when you demand accountability from corrupt leaders that have been in the same position for 15 years with a lifestyle that visibly exceeds their paychecks. 

Some good things before I sign off this very angry post. 

The piano has been a good distraction for me. I like finding pieces online and trying to play them. I like that even though many pieces are difficult at first, eventually I'm able to play it with enough practice. 

I started making an effort to call my grandma more frequently and she always seems genuinely excited and happy to talk to me. Its rare that I get these displays of affection and it really means alot. 

I was having a really bad day and my dad sent me a very nice message. There was a girl I knew in school who posted a message from her dad on facebook when she was going through a tough time and I always wondered what that would feel like. And now I do! 

Chairman Meow and Napolean

James and I have both had cats growing up and have always loved cats. In 2020, my cat Lola died after 9 years with us. She was already a grown cat when we adopted her, or when she adopted us. She was a stray and when we moved house in 2013 she decided that she wanted to live with us. James had Connie which was his childhood cat. 

We'd been researching shelters for a month now, and we emailed about 5 different places usually getting no response. The last shelter James emailed replied saying that there were too many people and too few cats and to look elsewhere. Honestly shelters here are so difficult to deal with, they have a million questions on their application form and then never get back to you except to say that they've got too many adopters and not enough cats. But then the cats are still on their website? It made me think that shelters prefer donations from people rather than people actually adopting the cats. 

So we started searching on gumtree. I'd shortlist potential cats and send them to James and usually about a day later the ad would be gone. Last Sunday I sent messages to two ads minutes after they had been posted and one came back saying the cat was gone and the other replied yes they're available! The cats owner was leaving the country and had to rehome 2 ginger cats who were brothers about a year old. They had been with a previous owner since birth, and had lived with the 2nd owner for a few months. I asked when could we take them and she said she'd be in all day and we could get them that day itself! 

We rushed to Morrisons to get cat litter and cat food, which we didn't need to get in the end because the cats previous owner gave us so many toys, litter trays, and food. Drove 1 hour to Riddlesdon north-west of Wakefield and picked up at the cats. Everything happened so quickly when we got there. She had been expecting us and had the door opened. She packed everything up and left them outside the house and we loaded everything into the car. The entire back seat and boot was filled with cat stuff. She placed a big carrier with the two cats outside last. They looked terrified, it was so sad. Their big eyes open wide wondering what was going on. It wasn't very emotional, the woman didn't ask many questions about where we lived or if we had other pets/ kids in the house. It made me a little sad that she didn't want to know more because these cats were part of her family and she was giving them up. But they were so well looked after and had so many toys and treats that they seemed like very well-loved cats. 

I sat with the cats in the back seat and we started driving back. They were meowing and didn't like the drive back. 20 mins in and one of the cats did a massive poo in the carrier and the whole car started to stink. Had the windows down and I think this scared the cats even more because of the wind and the loud motorway. I started to panic because the cats were rolling around in the poo and meowing really loudly to be let out. Kept looking at the clock every 3 mins and it felt like the longest car ride. 

When we got home we locked the cats in the upstairs bathroom while we took everything out of the car and unpacked their things into the kitchen as a bonding room. When we got upstairs to clean the cats they had walked around and gotten poo on everything. Bathed the cats and then spent an hour washing and cleaning the bathroom and then deep cleaning it again the next morning with bleach. It was fine after that second clean but it was starting to get extremely overwhelming for me. 

Cats seemed fine downstairs. Napolean was extremely skittish and scared, but Chairman Meow had started letting us give him strokes and would come up to us and give us head butts. Locked them in the kitchen for the night and the next morning they were scratching at the door wanting to be let out. Let them explore the house and they were so curious going into every room, sniffing everything, climbing everywhere. Honestly, cats get everywhere! Had to lock myself in the lounge to cat-proof it because all our power tools were out and they were meowing at the door to be let in. I've never had cats that were this clingy and honestly at this point I started to panic at how much attention they needed. That night was the worst because we didn't lock them in the kitchen and let them explore, which meant I had cats jumping on my face and head at 2am and meowing for attention. Can't handle 2 cats, I can't imagine me having kids and having to deal with that. 

At this point I was getting really stressed because they need so much attention during the day and don't let you sleep through the night. They also get cat hair everywhere and I was getting watery eyes and allergies. James said if he had to choose between me and the cats it would be the cats so do something about the allergies!!! Night 2 I shut the bedroom door but ended up being woken up every hour from the cats scratching the door wanting to be let in and then ripping up the carpet. To be honest the morning after that I was so stressed that this was going to be life from now on. James said they would settle soon and we should try locking them in the kitchen overnight because it doesn't have a carpet. Success! Good nights sleep, and happy cats in the morning. We got a feather toy which seriously tires out cats because its on a long extended stick. So you can wave it around and the kittens get a massive workout and you don't even have to move. They started to settle by day 4 and were much more independant. I'm even starting to miss how much they used to trail around me. 

I've been wanting to let them into the garden since we got them but James is adamant they we keep them indoors until they've been here 2 weeks which is exactly a week from now. Its just so exciting letting them out for the first time since their previous owners only kept them indoors. I need to be patient... which is extremely difficult for me. Really enjoying having the cats around now and I love how they snuggle up close when they want to nap and how they run up to you when they see you. 

Its definitely alot of work though. Previously I had so much support, kakak basically did everything for the cats. I feel quite bad because as an adult I'm so aware of what the cats needs are and what needs to be done for them eg 2 sessions of 20 mins playtime per day per cat. I didn't know/ research anything when I had my previous cats when I was 15. Its very rewarding and I'm so happy to have cats in our home, but its also a big responsibility and something I want to do right. 

Very excited for this new chapter of us + the meows! 

Cancel Culture

This weekend the KL legal twitter exploded with some pretty disturbing news. Allegations of sexual assault against a prominent local lawyer came out which the accused then denied. What was shocking was the fact that some people were so quick to defend the accused and blamed it on the accuser. As a woman, I can't imagine what you would gain by going public with information like that? Not only would you have to face trolls berating you for the same choices they are probably making too, but you risk exposing your own dirty laundry to the world. The only times when I've personally ranted on social media like that is when I've felt helpless or there isn't anyone that I could talk to and I just need to vent. So, I understand why she decided to call out her abuser. She probably felt like she had no other option for her own sanity, and also to warn others and protect them from him as he is someone in the public eye. 

I think society tends to blame women when bad things happen to them. Malaysian society tends to perpetuate victim blaming and places the burden on women to be the bigger person even when men behave immorally. The decision for her to come out and share her story must have taken so much courage and even now she must feel so threatened with all the online trolls. What's worse is seeing people I used to know and work with make statements siding with the abuser. Just because its your friend who you know to be a good person, you're going to completely disregard this woman's traumatic experience? 

I just feel dissapointed that in this day and age some men act like they are superior to women, and there are women that agree with this and don't hold these men to a higher standard. Just because you're well liked and well known and are in a respectable proffession and position does that then give you a free pass to behave as you like? 

If I were in her position I'd probably have thought that it wasn't worth the hassle. Dealing with the judgment and hate society throws at you, making you relive the trauma again. But then this makes it harder for other victims to come out. Its so brave to come out and fight for yourself no matter the consequence. 

Recently cancel culture has become quite common. Do something wrong, and you get called out and cancelled and you're deemed problematic. To be honest, previously when I've decided someone wronged me, thats it I was done. I'm out of there, no one deserves a second chance. But people aren't perfect I'm sure I've done bad things without realising it too and I'm sure those close to me have given me second chances. I think the lesson here is if you've done something wrong, own up to it and face the consequences and move on from that event. It just seems cruel to drag someone through the mud, particularly someone you were so intimate with just to clear your name. 

Believe victims, I can't imagine how difficult it must be for them to lay out the most vulnerable parts of their life for the world to see and scrutinise and pick apart. 

2021

Its January and a brand new year has started! 

2020 was definitely a challenging year for so many people. For me personally the lockdown itself wasn't as difficult because I had James with me. I started of 2020 skiing which was something completely new to me and I remember being terrified because my body just wasn't used to how strenuous skiing was and I felt inadequate compared to the rest who had been skiing for years. After a few lessons I felt like I could cope but again feeling like I'm always a few steps behind everyone else. I started running consistently and I can now easily run for an hour steadily. This is something I was never able to do before and I could never imagine myself as a 'runner'. It took practice and doing couch to 5k was such a strange experience for me because whilst you're doing it you don't feel like any change is happening at all. But after weeks and weeks of struggling and failing you get into a comfortable rhythm and realise that you CAN run. With running its more a mental struggle than a physical one which is not something I've been good at overcoming. 

I was in the middle of my masters when the pandemic struck in full swing. Lessons were cancelled and everything moved online. I enjoyed the first semester of my masters but having everything online completely ruined the experience of the 2nd semester. I feel even worse for those in their first year of degree who are now doing it virtually. The masters itself was really quite challenging and on hindsight I wonder if I would have chosen the same Masters had I known there would be a pandemic. The Maths aspect of the course was really difficult and I'm so proud of those results in particular. 

Since March 2020 this whole year has been a mixture of total lockdown, tier systems, and different lockdown rules, social distancing. At first I felt unaffected by this and things felt OK but after a while it did start to wear down on me. Especially when the rules in KL were relaxed and most people were on family holidays and attending weddings and things seemed like it was getting back to normal there. We were initially going to go back to KL whilst waiting for the new house to be built but because the cases were still quite bad Malaysia closed its borders, and its still closed now until March 2021. 

Living in James mums' house was also an experience because I had never lived with anyone for such a prolonged period of time that wasn't my own house or my parents house. Its difficult adapting to a new situation even though his mum was extremely gracious and treated us really well whilst we were there. She went above and beyond by cooking for us and cleaning and trying to give us as much space as possible. 

The main lesson that I want to take with me to 2021 is to have more patience, to be more positive, and to not get so worked up over something small. There have been plenty of times this year where I thought I knew best but no one really does and I want to be more flexible and adapt better to bad situations. More compassionate and kind when dealing with others. 

BEN NEVIS

Day 9 

We had planned to leave the B&B by 8 so that we could start making our way up Ben Nevis by 8.30. Since it was autumn/winter, it was going to be pitch black around 5 so we definitely needed to back by then. This didn't leave much time for breaks or to stop and have lunch. Had a massive cooked breakfast and croissant at the B&B before we left. 

It was a short 5 minute drive from the B&B to the base of Ben Nevis. We parked and started walking to the starting point steps. I was wearing Doc Martens which would prove to be a horrible decision after a few hours of climbing. James had bought proper lightweight waterproof hiking boots. To be honest, I started feeling out of breath and slightly tired after 10 minutes and we had only crossed the bridge and gotten to the starting point. The first leg of the climb was a winding path up the mountain. Not too bad because it was only a slight incline. After about 45 minutes of this then the real challenge started with the steps.  

View after 45 minutes up

Part 2 of the journey was steps. This was much harder because the steps could be shaky in some places and you could lose your footing if you weren't paying attention to where you were going. It started to pour at this point which made the weather quite humid. Steps went on for a few hours and we met lots of people going up at this point. 

Looks harmless but is actually really hard on your knees and
after 2 hours of this it can get quite exhausting. 

Bumped into this other couple who wanted us to take a picture of them
and we got a picture of us. My top looks so awkward because I
 stuffed a whole tissue box in my coat.

Stepped over this to get to the other side. Some parts of the mountain didn't have
a set path and you had to cross over water. 

I didn't take any picutres of the midway point, because we didn't stop for breaks and were powering through to get to the top and back down before it got dark. The midway point was a lake in the middle of the mountain and this is where the terrain completely changes. From seeing sheep and greenery, it becomes mostly snow and ice and rocks. Part 3 of the climb was just winding snow and ice up the mountain for another 2 hours. It got much darker at this point because we were quite high up and although the weather was good we were surrounded by fog and mist. The snow was manageable but the ice was so slippery and if you fell, you couldn't tell if you'd land on snow or a rock hidden under the snow. I fell a couple times here. It was also frustrating because my feet were really starting to hurt and I knew I'd have blisters soon and my feet were slightly wet. People started passing us by quite often too and this made me feel like we were losing our pace. Almost everyone was better dressed than us with crampons, hiking poles, and proper hiking boots and packs. Definitely regretting the shoes at this point. 

Part 4 of the climb was the worst. I was so cranky by this point I feel so bad for James on hindsight having to put up with me. The snow and ice made it so slippery and if you fell down you didn't know if it would be a pile of snow or rock that you were landing on. Each step felt so heavy and my heels started feeling really painful. After an hour of this you reach the last stretch where its so foggy all you can see is one boulder (cairns) in front of you. It was so frustrating not knowing how many boulders you were going to pass before you reached the top. The snow was up to my knees and seeped into my boots so my feet were completely soaked. The top of the mountain felt like you were going through a blizzard. I could barely see 2 feet infront of me and we thought we were the last ones on the mountain. We quickly ran to the little hut on the top, the 'marker' that you made it all the way. James climbed up and got in, I climbed up but didn't go in because the door had nails in it and getting a cut on the top of the mountain during a blizzard didnt seem like a good idea. At this point we decided to go back down and on the way we saw 5 other groups going up. They were much better prepared than us with crampons and hiking poles but there's no way they'd make it to the top and back down before it got dark.

The journey down was much quicker, despite falling down a few times. Our legs were so shaky at this point from exhaustion but we didn't take any breaks going down. 3 hours and we were at the base but I started to panic because I couldn't see the bridge and my knees and feet were so blistered at this point I just wanted to get off the mountain. Finally reached got to the base camp Glen Nevis and the minute I saw the car park the feeling of pure relief. My feet were aching and later when I took off my boots I realised that the docs had bitten into my heel and the skin had peeled off. The shower after was extremely painful and I had blood blisters which I couldn't pop. Basically my feet were gone. 

Despite all of this it was such a thrill knowing that I climbed Ben Nevis!! James is used to doing things that are physically challenging but its different for me. I rarely do things out of my comfort zone. Definitely looking forward to more thrills in the new year. 

Scotland Part 3

Day 6 

Today we were heading to the Botanical Gardens which was a 40 minute walk from 10 Hill Place the hotel we're staying at. I wanted to get a bus there, but James promised that it was just a short walk and the weather was nice so we should just walk there. 10 minutes in and it started absolutely pouring and we were soaking wet. The walk there was mostly uphill so I was sweating under all the layers, and wet from the rain at the same time. We packed quite warmly thinking Scotland was going to be much colder than Leeds but I think it's warmer, and with all the walking we're doing I can't wear my usual thick Zara coat. 

It was very nice once we got there. There was a Chinese garden section which had many familiar plants and massive trees. It was still drizzling so after an hour or so we went into an indoor garden area which had plants from warmer climates. The greenhouse was massive and hot and humid. These were the supposedly more exotic plants, but the hibiscus is everywhere in KL so I wasn't as impressed. This was the best part of the day because we met a CAT. He was so old he didn't even meow and just made little chirps. We probably spent 30 minutes just stroking him on a bench. I'm hopeless when I see a cat, they're too cute and I'm completely obsessed with them. 

Left the Botanical Gardens and took the bus back this time to the city centre. Walked around for a bit and found Mum's Place a Scottish restaurant that served pies. Had the best pies and milkshakes but the waitress was so slow it took us an hour from finishing to getting the bill. The food was so unbelievably good but we'll probably never go back there again because the service was so horrible. 

Marley the cat! 

We had booked on for a Whisky experience and it was surprisingly packed considering lockdown. The guy explaining it was 21 and that made me feel so old because the people giving tours are usually much older than I am. Making whisky was such a long labourious process I have no idea how the first people decided okay lets just ferment this for a few decades without knowing what it would turn out to be. I did like that at the end they gave us these crystal whisky glasses and a small bottle of whisky even though I don't drink it and its probably just going to sit on a shelf or be used for pepsi. It just feels so fancy!

Day 7 

The last full day in Edinburgh today so we started off by going to the Edinburgh Castle. I was really annoyed in the morning because we were unsure whether the castle would be open or closed because of high winds. Tried ringing them but no one answered until an hour before our slot to go in and I didn't have enough time to get ready. Half ran and half brisk walked there which made me even more grumpy. It was freezing when we got up there but it was worth it because it was so beautiful. The historical significance of the castle was it was a fortress and also a prison for prisoners of war. 

Took a few hours to fully explore the castle with the audio guides. Left just as it started to rain. Since we've been travelling for about 8 days now we decided to do laundry at this cafe where you can leave your clothes and come back later. The guy at the cafe was so amused that I was Malaysian and started singing the Malaysia truly Asia song. I miss having a stable home to do laundry in but its part of travelling particualrly since we're in between houses. James made me try a deep fried mars bar and I can confirm that its all hype and not nice at all. Just tastes like melted caramel and sugar in batter. Mars on its own isn't my favourite anyways so maybe that's why I didn't like it. 

Day 8 

Travelling to Fort William today so the morning was spent packing up , carting everything to the car and then a last stop at BRGR before we left. I got a new horror book called Twisted Ones to read for the rest of the trip since I finished my last horror book. I've read more this year than I have the last 5 years thanks to lockdown. Reached Fort William in the evening and made a quick pit stop to the fish and chip shop for dinner before calling it a night. Tomorrow we're climbing Ben Nevis and although I'm slightly scared people that have climbed it said it was definitely doable and a comfortable hike. Also, American Elections are happening right now!!! 

Had to stop because the windy roads were making me nauseous. 

Mist and fog on the drive up to Fort William.

Scotland Part 2

 Day 4 

Breakfast at Thomas J Walls Coffee today, a little coffee shop right opposite the National Musseum of Scotland. We wanted to go to Mum's Cafe originally but it was closed. I don't think I'm a breakfast person, I just can't eat much first thing when I wake up. 

We had pre-booked the National Musseum and when we got there it was super covid-proofed with a one way system in place and with many parts of the musseum cordoned off. There were 3 floors in the musseum, a fashion gallery of what people in different countries wore, an animal section and a science section. There wasn't much about actual Scottish history in the musseum but we did learn that Scotland was originally inhabitated by the Picts who were then driven out by the Scots who were from Ireland. Interesting how no one is really 'originally' from anywhere and people are constantly migrating and mixing their cultures. The Scottish people now are a mix of Picts and Scots from Ireland. 

I liked the exhibit about Mary Queen of Scots the most. She had such a difficult life and was then exiled by her son to London where she was executed by her cousin. Historically most things are just power centred and people end up being casualties. Almost every monarch was overthrown, ousted or exiled and many times by their own family. Familial ties can be so fragile. 

                                        

James did a kebab food run for dinner which turned out to be a super healthy kebab and not a greasy one with chips like I was expecting. 

Day 5 

When we were planning this trip James suggested going to the Edinburgh Zoo because we both love zoos and animals. Growing up I never really went to any zoos because my mum didn't believe in having animals in captivity. Did so much research about whether we should go and this article from the New York Times in particular made me realise that animals shouldn't be in zoos at all. James had already booked the tickets by the time I told him I didn't want to go anymore so I was feeling a little guilty when we went this morning. 

The enclosures at the Edinburgh Zoo were massive compared to any other zoo I had seen before. Each animal had almost a field of land and a closed area away from the public. Although this doesn't make up for being able to roam freely as they would in the wild it did make me feel slightly better about being there. Most animals had a list of public sponsors that paid to maintain them as well as support from the zoo itself. There were so many Malaysian animals too surprisingly like the Malayan Tiger, Tapir and Sun Bears. Best thing about it was the wallaby field where they were free range and you could just stroll into the field.

Because of lockdown rules in Scotland, everything shuts down at 6pm because of covid. So once we were done with the zoo and walked to Arthurs Seat we had dinner at this little burger diner near the hotel which did burgers and shakes and it was so good, even better than 5 guys.  

Ferrero milshake

Scotland Part 1

In between houses we're making a trip to Scotland and we'll be spending 2 days in Catlowdry, 5 days in Edinburgh, 3 days in Fort William and 4 days in Inverness. First time to Scotland for me so I'm quite excited but also not looking forward to moving around and having to pack and leave to different places so often. James travelled when he was younger and did lots of backpacking alone so this is nothing to him but living out of a suitcase for 6 weeks will be something new for me. 

Day One 

Once we moved everything to storage we got in the car and drove 3 hours up north to Catlowdry a small village near the Scottish border. The road was really twisty and winding, even worse than Cameron Highlands and thats only an hour long. There no streetlights once we got off the main road so it was quite scary driving in pitch black darkness. I made a Spotify playlist for the trip but it was only for 2 hours, think we'll need to stick to podcasts for driving after this. I really didn't like driving at night on the backroads because there aren't any streetlights and you can't see if a car is coming round the corner. 

After 3 hours of driving 

Once we checked in, the night drive into town to get dinner.

The B&B was run by this old couple who were really sweet and once we parked we saw a big tabby cat at the entrance. Breakfast was included and it was on really fancy china and everything was set on a glass plate. James said it reminds him of his grandma's house and mine too, mama keeps all the good plates in a glass cupboard. After getting the fish and chips takeaway we went back and watched The Holiday for the first time. The town was so deserted at 7pm on a Monday there were no shops open apart from the fish and chip shop and teenagers were just walking about aimlessly huddled in little groups. It must be so strange growing up in a place like this, so different from KL and the constant city buzz. 

The room was very nicely decorated and felt like I was in an old film. I do like having a bed-side table and the bed was so much nicer than my old bed at Lodge House I had a perfect nights sleep. I think curtains are the way to go. My room in KL has glass window in the ceiling so its never pitch black at night. 

Day Two 

After breakfast we set off to do a 8 mile hike around Kelder Forest Park but because there were so many road closures we were driving for 3 hours. I got really nauseous at this point and felt like vomitting. We stopped by the side of the road so that I could rest for a bit. I wasn't cold at all because I was so wrapped up but James was freezing in his sweats. We drove to a nearby small town called Hawick but by then I was feeling so ill I just wanted to go back. Kelder Forest Park day was a fail. Went back to the room and I recovered after an hour or two and then back out we went. 

Left the room just as it started to rain and by the time we had left the gate it was pouring. I had my mask up so I didn't get rain on my face but we were completely soaked within minutes. James had some issues navigating and we ended up in a forest that looked like it had been burnt down and completely covered in mud. Took about an hour to get back and by then clothes, shoes everything was completely soaked and I was so stressed. Put everything on the radiator and just went to bed. A few hours later we watched a Mandalorian episode and then got ready for dinner at the Hidden River Cafe which was only 12 minutes away but in pitch black darkness we missed the exit and had to go back. Dinner was amazing and made up for getting rained on earlier that day. One of the best meals I've had and it was all seafood tapas. I wonder how they managed to get such a pro chef in the middle of nowhere. 

I didn't get any pictures of the food except dessert because we were too hungry and by the time the food arrived we just wanted to nom. The restaurant was set in a wooden barn which had two floors and residential cabins surrounding it. It would be a good place for a family bonding trip because there's nothing to do except to talk to each other and maybe play board games. I suggested this but James said that it was unlikely my family would agree to something like that. 

It was so beautiful 

Cookie dough waffles with ice cream

Day Three 

After breakfast we packed up and were in the car on the way to Dryburgh which has the Scots Monument and a giant statue of William Wallace. It took about 2 hours to get there and the weather wasn't too bad so we got out and walked around. I think I hate walking even if its short distances I wish I could go drive everywhere. This trip has made me realise that I am 26 with the body of an 86 year old. 

Got back in the car and drove for another hour to Edinburgh. I think I was expecting a big bustling city like Manchester or London but its more like York but spread out. Population of Edinburgh is only 500k and the houses are much older, cobbled streets and it looked less urban. Parked the car and trekked through old town to visit Armchair books. I wish I could have spent longer in here but I didn't wear contacts today and my glasses kept steaming up because we had to wear masks and I felt so uncomfortable. I saw a Grimms Stories book which I'd never seen before and Alice's Adventures through the looking glass which is one of my favourite books. I wish I had gotten the Grimms Stories but it was £29 and it was more a novelty collectors item than a story book so I didn't get it. 

Went to the national monument which I struggled with at the beginning because I was wearing my Dr Martens and my heel was starting to hurt. Honestly, I am so scared and nervous for our Ben Nevis climb. I think Edinburgh is such a nice city to live in, the architecture is so pretty and the view from the national monument was amazing. James likes how the city is such a mixture of old and new with the castle on one side overlooking the high street on the next. 

Overlooking the Royal Mile

View from the National Monument 

Had an early dinner at KFC and James got the double down burger which I can't understand. Its just two chicken patties with cheese in the middle. I love the hotel that we're in because there's a rainfall shower which I feel is the epitome of luxury, that and an efficient kettle. First full day of Edinburgh tomorrow!